After the birth of a baby, everyone is very excited and it is such a wondrous event. Why then, do you feel like you just want to leave this life? Why do you feel like you don't like your baby?
It is a time when you feel guilty and abnormal. You know that you 'should' love your baby, you know that you 'should' feel elated. This kind of depression is often hidden as the new mother feels very ashamed that she doesn't 'love ' her baby as she 'should'.
There is no shame in depression. It is merely a state of mind, an imbalance in your system, one that you need to acknowledge. It is important to acknowledge these feelings and discuss them with a counsellor or a very good friend or your husband/partner. PND is usually a temporary depression, but if left unchecked, as in my case, serious depression can result.
There are still things you can do to assist yourself in creating a balance in your life and aiding your body into wellness.
1. Admit your feelings to someone and acknowledge that this is PND.
2. Each day, try to find something about your baby that you love. This will help you to see the beauty. I know this may seem like a silly suggestion, but it is necessary to bring about acceptance.
3. Instead of resenting the baby for waking you up for a feed, realize that this is what the babe will do and try to accept it instead of fighting against it.
4 Make a plan to have someone pop over during the day to allow you to have a good 2 hours or so sleep to help you. When you are sleep deprived, this can really take depression to an all time low. If you don't have someone to help, be very strict on allowing yourself to get sleep when your baby sleeps. Don't worry about the state of the house - care more about the state of you!!
This is a very complex time and so much more can be said about this, but in the efforts to remain brief, I'll stop here!
If you or someone you care about is showing signs of PND, lend them a hand, even if they don't appear to want it. Sometimes we need to force our way in and help to allow them to heal.
I hope the week ahead is filled with joyous moments.
Take care
Deb
