Setting Goals and achieving them Part 2..

Well, I hope you have had a great week compiling your list of goals and deciding what to focus on. When you are in a depressed state, one of the ways to help yourself to overcome overwhelming emotions is to focus on a goal. Even if that goal is simple , like, making sure you leave your house at least once a day. Goals don't have to be grand , they can just be something that you personally would like to achieve.  I have more points for you , as I said in my previous post to assist you in creating a focus. Points 1 to 5 are in my previous post.

6. Be Specific in what direction you want to go in, and how you propose to get closer to your goal. What do you hope to achieve by reaching your goal? You need to be aware of what is driving you to achieve and maintain your focus, as this will help you with maintaining your  motivation.

7. Committment - Failure is not an option.When you don't allow yourself an out, you have no choice but to move forward and proceed with your plans.

8. Progress reports to stay on track. On a road to reach a destination, you have signs to show you the way. Signs are like a feed back to you to say you're on the right road. Check regularly to see that what you are doing is taking you closer to your goal, not further away.

9. Goals are your jigsaw lid ! Have you ever tried to put a jigsaw together without the picture on the lid? It's really difficult and for some of us, just impossible ! The lid is like your goals and the jigsaw is your life. Don't try to create the jigsaw of your life without the goals to guide you. You will spend a lot of frustrating times, wondering why your life isn't working.

10. A goal is an idea of what you'd like in your life. It all begins as a dream and becomes a goal, once you realize you can obtain it.

I realize that depending on your level of depression, this post may not suit you, but I urge you to try some goal setting. Keep it simple and go for achieving one goal at a time. If you make too many goals at once, you can become over whelmed and achieve none .
I wish you good times this week. Use the days ahead wisely and with purpose.
Take care til next time.
Deb

Setting Goals and Achieving them, Part 1.

Setting goals is  a very important part of healing yourself from depression. By setting one goal at a time, you are learning to take yourself in a positive direction. Often, we don't really know what we want, so it's important to think about and write down all that we'd like to achieve first. Here are some tips:

1. Visualize your goal: Focus on what you intend to receive when you've achieved your goal. Take your thoughts into the right direction. Notice that your life will move towards what you think about, so be aware of your thoughts.
2. Don't focus on obstacles. Identify any potential conflicts surrounding this goal. You can't move forward successfully until these conflicts have been resolved.
3. Write your ideas of what you'd like to achieve down. This process is not planned but more brainstormed. The reason for this step is to build enthusiasm and bring energy and motivation into the idea that you have.
4. Once you've got a list of ideas and great enthusiasm, now you can put your actual , specific goals down in writing.
5. Set a deadline for your goal. For Example, as soon as you decide to visit the mountains, and you've booked your accomadation- guess what happens? From then on, everything and anything to do with the mountains will start to show itself to you. It is like this for a goal. The goal comes first, and then we see how to achieve it. Sometimes we only see ahead a little bit at a time, but we're going in the right direction towards achieving it.

I have 5 more points to add to this, so next week I'll add onto this goal setting  post. It is really important in helping you towards positive change. In the meantime, think about where you are going and where you'd like to be. Put some of these ideas into action.
Until next week,
Take care
Deb

Life Change/ new job- how this affects you...

I began a part time job at the end of last year. With that, comes all sorts of difficulties , mentally. There is the stress of being in a new environment, learning new things and trying to retain all the information. A new job can be a very stressful time. It generally takes at least 6 months to settle in and feel comfortable and loose your anxieties. This is not only for a new job, but also a life change of some sort. There are the same feelings and stresses that you go through. It is at this time that we are most prone to dipping back into our depression.
The reason we feel stressed is because we are facing fears that appear too large at that time. During this time you will probably feel over whelmed and go through confusion. The reason for this is that , your life has lost the balance that you had it at, and now you are trying to regain your balance with your change in it. The regaining of balance can be quite a tricky thing. The first step to helping yourself in this situation is to acknowledge how you are feeling- really how you are feeling !!
Once you've realized this, then you can begin to regain your balance. The ways to bring yourself together could be:
a) Meditation
b) walking in the fresh air.
c) planning all your evening meals for the week ( this removes the added stress of decisions !)
d)Taking some time out for yourself to do something that you love.

There are so many more things you could be doing to help, but I have found those the most helpful in getting you back on track.
I hope your week ahead is calm and stress free.
Take care
Deb

Find your focus !

Do you ever feel "absent minded" ? It is a feeling of floating aimlessly, almost lost. There is an abscense of joy. This is very much like the depths of depression.
It is during this time that things pass you by, people pass you by. It is like drifting in a fog. During this time so much is lost - we loose the connectedness of life.
As humans, it is important to make connections - to places, people and even some things. It is who we are. So, if you have been feeling "absent minded" lately, it is because you are focusing on the wrong things. STOP. Take some time now, to review your last month and what your focus has been. Now, decide what you would like your focus in life to be.
Every step you take forward, remind yourself of your focus and make sure that your steps take you towards your goal, not further away.This does take considerable effort and you can't slip back into the fog. If it helps you to retain your focus, write your goal down several times and stick it places that you look at a lot . For example , mirror, computer, TV, fridge etc.
It is also important to only focus on one main goal at a time. By doing this, you are sure to succeed at it, as it is of sole importance.
I wish you joy this week. Find your focus and move solidly towards it.
Good luck.
Take care
Deb

Slipping back into Depression....

Recently I was reminded of how easy it is to slip back down into the depths of depression. It can be an accumulation of things that pushes you down. The signs to look out for are:
* Inability to focus on other people- as one becomes too consumed by self.
* Increasingly withdrawn from friends- a sense of deep unhappiness.
* An increase of crying for the seemingly minor things.
* An overwhelming feeling that life is spiralling out of control and you need to get out.

If you feel this way, seek help. I tend to speak out to a friend and by doing so gain perspective of where I'm at. You may feel the same or need to see a professional, like a counsellor who can help to empower you. Either way, it is important at this point to get all the negative , sad, desparate, overwhelming things out in the open. When you do this, you are able to view things from a better perspective and get a sense of wanting to get out of the hole. It can take a few days or weeks to get to a better place, but , perservere as you will get there.
 During this time, be gentle on yourself. Realize that you are needing some special attention and take steps to give yourself just that. I do not mean, go on a shopping trip to make yourself feel better!!! That is just a band-aid!! Special attention requires assessment of self, talking to someone, writing in a journal and stopping your normal routine to 'smell the roses'.

I'm still clawing my way back up, but writing helps me a great deal. I'd love to hear what helps you when you're depressed. If you get a moment, please post a comment, it might help someone else too!
Take care
Debxxx

Living in the Now - how this helps to combat Depression.

Living in the now - I know this sounds strange, but so often we dwell on what has happened or what could happen! If you dwell on what has happened, you're living in the past and can't seem to let things go. Maybe they are not negative things , just things you're constantly remembering, your memories. This is fabulous, but , be careful that this is the only place you're dwelling. It's important to feel comfortable with what is happening around us on a daily basis.
If you think too much about the past, your memories, you will not always have your wits about you in your everyday life. Opportunites might pass you by, friends might start to overlook you and you become increasingly isolated. All this will increase your depressive state. If your memories are not good, well, obviously you will then keep yourself locked in your depression , trapped by your mind.
If you are planning too far ahead by worrying about what could happen, well then , you are also not present. The exact same thing happens to you. You are so focused ahead of yourself that you miss the important events that are happening right now. The worrying clogs your brain functioning, causing you to become overwhelmed and highly stressed . All this will naturally affect your mental health.
The Present: Stay focused on what is happening as it happens. When you are riding a bike, just concentrate on that and look around you enjoying it- think of nothing else. When cooking, only think of that. Refer to my previous post on Multi tasking, this give more info.
The Past: The past is important as it is from this that we learn and move forward in life. Take lessons from your past, be aware of what you've learned, but then try to let them go. If it has not served you well in the past, it will not serve you well in the future.
The Future: Planning ahead is very organized for certain events, like a wedding or party etc, but worrying about future events is energy sapping. Try to be aware of your thoughts of the future. Are you planning constructively or worrying?

I hope you will try to live in the present - it helps to keep you grounded and focused for your daily living.
Take care
Deb

Hope in the midst of Depression

In this world that we live in, there are so many tragic events. If we dwell on these tragic events in life, we begin to question life and its purpose- we begin to lose hope.
As a person suffering with depression, it is particularly important to view each day as a new beginning. As you wake up in the morning, picture all the emotional stuff that you had from the day before , being wiped off the slate and now you begin again- from a clean slate.
That is the beauty of life, there is a new beginning when the sun rises each day. Each day we have another chance at making our world a  beautiful place to be. Each day we get another chance to change something that we don't like or want in our lives. Each day is fresh, is new and filled with hope.

When you're in the midst of depression, hope begins to fade. When you wake up each day, you feel a sense of dread and heaviness. It is important to recognise this feeling and know that only you can change it to create a better place for yourself. Here are some tips to help brighten your morning with hope:

1. As you wake, give thanks (doesn't have to be to God) for something that you enjoy in your life eg that you can walk, see, hear, have a great child, have a home.....etc
2. When you've got your morning drink, have a look outside and notice the leaves, branches, birds around. If there's ice on the ground, notice the sparkles, if there's dew, notice the glimmer.
3. Take time during the day, to stop. When you stop, notice nature around you and enjoy it.
4. When you can, take a walk to the park, down the street, or just sit in your back garden. Learn to look outside of yourself, it is by doing this that you'll learn to stop analyzing everything that you do!

Let's build hope together in this crazy world, for without it, there is nothing.
Have a great week.
Take care
Deb