I began a part time job at the end of last year. With that, comes all sorts of difficulties , mentally. There is the stress of being in a new environment, learning new things and trying to retain all the information. A new job can be a very stressful time. It generally takes at least 6 months to settle in and feel comfortable and loose your anxieties. This is not only for a new job, but also a life change of some sort. There are the same feelings and stresses that you go through. It is at this time that we are most prone to dipping back into our depression.
The reason we feel stressed is because we are facing fears that appear too large at that time. During this time you will probably feel over whelmed and go through confusion. The reason for this is that , your life has lost the balance that you had it at, and now you are trying to regain your balance with your change in it. The regaining of balance can be quite a tricky thing. The first step to helping yourself in this situation is to acknowledge how you are feeling- really how you are feeling !!
Once you've realized this, then you can begin to regain your balance. The ways to bring yourself together could be:
a) Meditation
b) walking in the fresh air.
c) planning all your evening meals for the week ( this removes the added stress of decisions !)
d)Taking some time out for yourself to do something that you love.
There are so many more things you could be doing to help, but I have found those the most helpful in getting you back on track.
I hope your week ahead is calm and stress free.
Take care
Deb
27 April 2011
Find your focus !
Do you ever feel "absent minded" ? It is a feeling of floating aimlessly, almost lost. There is an abscense of joy. This is very much like the depths of depression.
It is during this time that things pass you by, people pass you by. It is like drifting in a fog. During this time so much is lost - we loose the connectedness of life.
As humans, it is important to make connections - to places, people and even some things. It is who we are. So, if you have been feeling "absent minded" lately, it is because you are focusing on the wrong things. STOP. Take some time now, to review your last month and what your focus has been. Now, decide what you would like your focus in life to be.
Every step you take forward, remind yourself of your focus and make sure that your steps take you towards your goal, not further away.This does take considerable effort and you can't slip back into the fog. If it helps you to retain your focus, write your goal down several times and stick it places that you look at a lot . For example , mirror, computer, TV, fridge etc.
It is also important to only focus on one main goal at a time. By doing this, you are sure to succeed at it, as it is of sole importance.
I wish you joy this week. Find your focus and move solidly towards it.
Good luck.
Take care
Deb
It is during this time that things pass you by, people pass you by. It is like drifting in a fog. During this time so much is lost - we loose the connectedness of life.
As humans, it is important to make connections - to places, people and even some things. It is who we are. So, if you have been feeling "absent minded" lately, it is because you are focusing on the wrong things. STOP. Take some time now, to review your last month and what your focus has been. Now, decide what you would like your focus in life to be.
Every step you take forward, remind yourself of your focus and make sure that your steps take you towards your goal, not further away.This does take considerable effort and you can't slip back into the fog. If it helps you to retain your focus, write your goal down several times and stick it places that you look at a lot . For example , mirror, computer, TV, fridge etc.
It is also important to only focus on one main goal at a time. By doing this, you are sure to succeed at it, as it is of sole importance.
I wish you joy this week. Find your focus and move solidly towards it.
Good luck.
Take care
Deb
06 April 2011
Slipping back into Depression....
Recently I was reminded of how easy it is to slip back down into the depths of depression. It can be an accumulation of things that pushes you down. The signs to look out for are:
* Inability to focus on other people- as one becomes too consumed by self.
* Increasingly withdrawn from friends- a sense of deep unhappiness.
* An increase of crying for the seemingly minor things.
* An overwhelming feeling that life is spiralling out of control and you need to get out.
If you feel this way, seek help. I tend to speak out to a friend and by doing so gain perspective of where I'm at. You may feel the same or need to see a professional, like a counsellor who can help to empower you. Either way, it is important at this point to get all the negative , sad, desparate, overwhelming things out in the open. When you do this, you are able to view things from a better perspective and get a sense of wanting to get out of the hole. It can take a few days or weeks to get to a better place, but , perservere as you will get there.
During this time, be gentle on yourself. Realize that you are needing some special attention and take steps to give yourself just that. I do not mean, go on a shopping trip to make yourself feel better!!! That is just a band-aid!! Special attention requires assessment of self, talking to someone, writing in a journal and stopping your normal routine to 'smell the roses'.
I'm still clawing my way back up, but writing helps me a great deal. I'd love to hear what helps you when you're depressed. If you get a moment, please post a comment, it might help someone else too!
Take care
Debxxx
* Inability to focus on other people- as one becomes too consumed by self.
* Increasingly withdrawn from friends- a sense of deep unhappiness.
* An increase of crying for the seemingly minor things.
* An overwhelming feeling that life is spiralling out of control and you need to get out.
If you feel this way, seek help. I tend to speak out to a friend and by doing so gain perspective of where I'm at. You may feel the same or need to see a professional, like a counsellor who can help to empower you. Either way, it is important at this point to get all the negative , sad, desparate, overwhelming things out in the open. When you do this, you are able to view things from a better perspective and get a sense of wanting to get out of the hole. It can take a few days or weeks to get to a better place, but , perservere as you will get there.
During this time, be gentle on yourself. Realize that you are needing some special attention and take steps to give yourself just that. I do not mean, go on a shopping trip to make yourself feel better!!! That is just a band-aid!! Special attention requires assessment of self, talking to someone, writing in a journal and stopping your normal routine to 'smell the roses'.
I'm still clawing my way back up, but writing helps me a great deal. I'd love to hear what helps you when you're depressed. If you get a moment, please post a comment, it might help someone else too!
Take care
Debxxx
30 March 2011
Living in the Now - how this helps to combat Depression.
Living in the now - I know this sounds strange, but so often we dwell on what has happened or what could happen! If you dwell on what has happened, you're living in the past and can't seem to let things go. Maybe they are not negative things , just things you're constantly remembering, your memories. This is fabulous, but , be careful that this is the only place you're dwelling. It's important to feel comfortable with what is happening around us on a daily basis.
If you think too much about the past, your memories, you will not always have your wits about you in your everyday life. Opportunites might pass you by, friends might start to overlook you and you become increasingly isolated. All this will increase your depressive state. If your memories are not good, well, obviously you will then keep yourself locked in your depression , trapped by your mind.
If you are planning too far ahead by worrying about what could happen, well then , you are also not present. The exact same thing happens to you. You are so focused ahead of yourself that you miss the important events that are happening right now. The worrying clogs your brain functioning, causing you to become overwhelmed and highly stressed . All this will naturally affect your mental health.
The Present: Stay focused on what is happening as it happens. When you are riding a bike, just concentrate on that and look around you enjoying it- think of nothing else. When cooking, only think of that. Refer to my previous post on Multi tasking, this give more info.
The Past: The past is important as it is from this that we learn and move forward in life. Take lessons from your past, be aware of what you've learned, but then try to let them go. If it has not served you well in the past, it will not serve you well in the future.
The Future: Planning ahead is very organized for certain events, like a wedding or party etc, but worrying about future events is energy sapping. Try to be aware of your thoughts of the future. Are you planning constructively or worrying?
I hope you will try to live in the present - it helps to keep you grounded and focused for your daily living.
Take care
Deb
If you think too much about the past, your memories, you will not always have your wits about you in your everyday life. Opportunites might pass you by, friends might start to overlook you and you become increasingly isolated. All this will increase your depressive state. If your memories are not good, well, obviously you will then keep yourself locked in your depression , trapped by your mind.
If you are planning too far ahead by worrying about what could happen, well then , you are also not present. The exact same thing happens to you. You are so focused ahead of yourself that you miss the important events that are happening right now. The worrying clogs your brain functioning, causing you to become overwhelmed and highly stressed . All this will naturally affect your mental health.
The Present: Stay focused on what is happening as it happens. When you are riding a bike, just concentrate on that and look around you enjoying it- think of nothing else. When cooking, only think of that. Refer to my previous post on Multi tasking, this give more info.
The Past: The past is important as it is from this that we learn and move forward in life. Take lessons from your past, be aware of what you've learned, but then try to let them go. If it has not served you well in the past, it will not serve you well in the future.
The Future: Planning ahead is very organized for certain events, like a wedding or party etc, but worrying about future events is energy sapping. Try to be aware of your thoughts of the future. Are you planning constructively or worrying?
I hope you will try to live in the present - it helps to keep you grounded and focused for your daily living.
Take care
Deb
23 March 2011
Hope in the midst of Depression
In this world that we live in, there are so many tragic events. If we dwell on these tragic events in life, we begin to question life and its purpose- we begin to lose hope.
As a person suffering with depression, it is particularly important to view each day as a new beginning. As you wake up in the morning, picture all the emotional stuff that you had from the day before , being wiped off the slate and now you begin again- from a clean slate.
That is the beauty of life, there is a new beginning when the sun rises each day. Each day we have another chance at making our world a beautiful place to be. Each day we get another chance to change something that we don't like or want in our lives. Each day is fresh, is new and filled with hope.
When you're in the midst of depression, hope begins to fade. When you wake up each day, you feel a sense of dread and heaviness. It is important to recognise this feeling and know that only you can change it to create a better place for yourself. Here are some tips to help brighten your morning with hope:
1. As you wake, give thanks (doesn't have to be to God) for something that you enjoy in your life eg that you can walk, see, hear, have a great child, have a home.....etc
2. When you've got your morning drink, have a look outside and notice the leaves, branches, birds around. If there's ice on the ground, notice the sparkles, if there's dew, notice the glimmer.
3. Take time during the day, to stop. When you stop, notice nature around you and enjoy it.
4. When you can, take a walk to the park, down the street, or just sit in your back garden. Learn to look outside of yourself, it is by doing this that you'll learn to stop analyzing everything that you do!
Let's build hope together in this crazy world, for without it, there is nothing.
Have a great week.
Take care
Deb
As a person suffering with depression, it is particularly important to view each day as a new beginning. As you wake up in the morning, picture all the emotional stuff that you had from the day before , being wiped off the slate and now you begin again- from a clean slate.
That is the beauty of life, there is a new beginning when the sun rises each day. Each day we have another chance at making our world a beautiful place to be. Each day we get another chance to change something that we don't like or want in our lives. Each day is fresh, is new and filled with hope.
When you're in the midst of depression, hope begins to fade. When you wake up each day, you feel a sense of dread and heaviness. It is important to recognise this feeling and know that only you can change it to create a better place for yourself. Here are some tips to help brighten your morning with hope:
1. As you wake, give thanks (doesn't have to be to God) for something that you enjoy in your life eg that you can walk, see, hear, have a great child, have a home.....etc
2. When you've got your morning drink, have a look outside and notice the leaves, branches, birds around. If there's ice on the ground, notice the sparkles, if there's dew, notice the glimmer.
3. Take time during the day, to stop. When you stop, notice nature around you and enjoy it.
4. When you can, take a walk to the park, down the street, or just sit in your back garden. Learn to look outside of yourself, it is by doing this that you'll learn to stop analyzing everything that you do!
Let's build hope together in this crazy world, for without it, there is nothing.
Have a great week.
Take care
Deb
10 March 2011
Letting go....
It has come to my attention that there are many people out there, who just can't let things go!! It may be something big or small, it doesn't matter, the point is that if you don't release it, it will rule you and affect your mental state contributing to an increasing depression.
We are not always aware of the fact that we are harbouring thoughts about someone who has wronged us - in our eyes. We think we have moved on but find ourselves discussing the issue with many friends repeatedly. Have a think....... has this happened to you recently? Do you find yourself speaking ill of someone in particular , frequently?
Letting go is not as easy as it sounds. It is something that only you can do and is totally controlled by you and the way you react to situations. Here are some tips for letting go:
1. Acknowledge that you are repeatedly refering to a situation and carrying around bad feelings about it.
2. Purchase a 'letting go' book, which is a blank book for you to write in. It is here that you are going to write about all the bad feelings you feel and everything that you want to do. It will probably not be reading for anyone other than yourself!!
3. Every day, several times a day, whenever you have thoughts of anger or irritation about this person or situation, you need to write it down in the book. Instead of repeating yourself to those around you, you are now going to remain silent on the issue and only write about it.
4. This is a process , which means it will take some time, but eventually you'll find you write in there less and less because the issue diminishes in importance. You are beginning to let go..
Letting go is of incredible importance to our mental state. If we hold onto past hurts, angers, irritations and grievances, we keep all the resentments inside us. It is all this that can fester and assist in causing dis-eases like cancer. Be aware of how you feel towards those who are close to you and repair any grievances.
By letting go, you will bring more peace into your life and chase away the cobwebs of depression.
May the week ahead be one where you release the hurts and begin to see life as a wonderful place again.
Take care till next time..
Deb
We are not always aware of the fact that we are harbouring thoughts about someone who has wronged us - in our eyes. We think we have moved on but find ourselves discussing the issue with many friends repeatedly. Have a think....... has this happened to you recently? Do you find yourself speaking ill of someone in particular , frequently?
Letting go is not as easy as it sounds. It is something that only you can do and is totally controlled by you and the way you react to situations. Here are some tips for letting go:
1. Acknowledge that you are repeatedly refering to a situation and carrying around bad feelings about it.
2. Purchase a 'letting go' book, which is a blank book for you to write in. It is here that you are going to write about all the bad feelings you feel and everything that you want to do. It will probably not be reading for anyone other than yourself!!
3. Every day, several times a day, whenever you have thoughts of anger or irritation about this person or situation, you need to write it down in the book. Instead of repeating yourself to those around you, you are now going to remain silent on the issue and only write about it.
4. This is a process , which means it will take some time, but eventually you'll find you write in there less and less because the issue diminishes in importance. You are beginning to let go..
Letting go is of incredible importance to our mental state. If we hold onto past hurts, angers, irritations and grievances, we keep all the resentments inside us. It is all this that can fester and assist in causing dis-eases like cancer. Be aware of how you feel towards those who are close to you and repair any grievances.
By letting go, you will bring more peace into your life and chase away the cobwebs of depression.
May the week ahead be one where you release the hurts and begin to see life as a wonderful place again.
Take care till next time..
Deb
23 February 2011
7 Steps to Creating a healthy life
You can chose to create a healthy life. It is your choice even if you feel your depression is just something you have to live with. Well, you don't. Here are some ways that you can improve your general health and well being:
1. GRATITUDE. Keep a gratitude journal in which every day, you write at least 5 things that you are grateful for. This helps with allowing the brain to recognize the beauty in your life.
2. ENVIRONMENT. Surround yourself with open spaces, organization, flowers, beauty and your life will reflect that. If you surround yourself with clutter, dead plants, and chaos, your life will reflect ill health and chaos. You choose.
3.POLLUTION. Stop polluting your mind with visual images of depressing things. Limit television viewing, loud music, loud social environments. Allow there to be times of peace and tranquility and then your life will reflect this.
4.ASSOCIATION. Check on who you associate with and make sure it is with people who you really like and who reciprocate these feelings. The association must be a positive one for you. Sometimes we associate with people who don't bring out the best in us, be aware of this and change it.
5.LOVE. Always try to do the things that you love, that way, you will always love what you're doing!! If there is love involved, your life will always be a happy place.
6.RELAX. Take time out to relax your entire body including the mind. You could practise meditation or do an activity that brings about profound peace and relaxation to you.
7. BALANCE. Work out your priorities and balance your work, home and health into one. I include health in this as it involves exercise which needs to be scheduled into your balance. Whatever you rate as the most important will be what your focus is currently on. What is that for you? You can change that today by taking some steps to re-prioritize.
I hope this gives you something to think about. I'd like to suggest that you copy and paste this list , print it out and stick it somewhere that you look at every day. This will remind you that you have choices and you will then make the right ones if you are always aware.
Have a great week making healthy choices !
Take care
Deb
1. GRATITUDE. Keep a gratitude journal in which every day, you write at least 5 things that you are grateful for. This helps with allowing the brain to recognize the beauty in your life.
2. ENVIRONMENT. Surround yourself with open spaces, organization, flowers, beauty and your life will reflect that. If you surround yourself with clutter, dead plants, and chaos, your life will reflect ill health and chaos. You choose.
3.POLLUTION. Stop polluting your mind with visual images of depressing things. Limit television viewing, loud music, loud social environments. Allow there to be times of peace and tranquility and then your life will reflect this.
4.ASSOCIATION. Check on who you associate with and make sure it is with people who you really like and who reciprocate these feelings. The association must be a positive one for you. Sometimes we associate with people who don't bring out the best in us, be aware of this and change it.
5.LOVE. Always try to do the things that you love, that way, you will always love what you're doing!! If there is love involved, your life will always be a happy place.
6.RELAX. Take time out to relax your entire body including the mind. You could practise meditation or do an activity that brings about profound peace and relaxation to you.
7. BALANCE. Work out your priorities and balance your work, home and health into one. I include health in this as it involves exercise which needs to be scheduled into your balance. Whatever you rate as the most important will be what your focus is currently on. What is that for you? You can change that today by taking some steps to re-prioritize.
I hope this gives you something to think about. I'd like to suggest that you copy and paste this list , print it out and stick it somewhere that you look at every day. This will remind you that you have choices and you will then make the right ones if you are always aware.
Have a great week making healthy choices !
Take care
Deb
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